And your point is......

In all relationships, one has moments where you say, “ok, this is built to last.”  In my friendship with Ruthie, that moment came in Slovakia.  She had planned out a great itinerary for our spring break trip through Eastern Europe, and I had decided that we needed to introduce an element of spontaneity to get “the authentic experience” (darn that Anthropology 101 class for teaching me about “the gaze”).  So I suggested we hop off the train at a random stop, in…..Slovakia.  Ruthie asked me to do just a little research, but at our hostel the internet was down, so I pressed on without any real information.  We got off at Cuty and got to see why some places don’t make it into the travel guides.  Cuty had no hotels, no ATMS, a weird guy who followed us around, and nowhere for us to spend the 4 hours until the next train to Brno except the train station or sitting in the rain at the bus stop.

We've been spotted doing weird things on three continents, in at least 7 countries!  And
spotted posing as raptors.....a lot.  Dhaka watch out!

I had failed.  I had wasted several hours of our precious vacation time in a sleepy town that left much (everything) to be desired.  Ruthie had every right to explode on me for a hair-brained scheme, poor planning, etc.  But instead, we were filming post-modern shorts on her camera, taking gangsta pictures with our hoodies and sunglasses (in the rain), and just having a blast.  And instead of being the moment that broke our friendship, it’s ended up being one of the stories that we tell often and with a great deal of fondness—it proved that it’s who you’re with that matters most for having fun.  Sure it’s easier to have fun in a place like Prague where there are beautiful castles and things, but the scenery only takes you so far.  Luckily you can find weird guys anywhere (but more on that later).

Case in point: once Ruthie was awake and we got some coffee in her, we plopped down in the posh lobby of the Westin while we waited for my friend to pick us up.  Naturally we were drawn to the egg shaped chairs that spin, and before you know it, the camera is snapping, we’ve got our sunglasses on and we’re doing gangsta humpty dumpty impressions.  When in Rome, right?

Not a country yolkel anymore, thank you very much

Hatching schemes, as usual

It's a scramble to get us moving again. We've got such big eggos that they weigh us down.

At lunch, Ruthie gets to meet couple of the guys I play soccer with: Saad and Tawsif.  When Saad invited Tawsif, he’d said, “Do you want to have lunch tomorrow with two Harvard women?”  Evidently the only word that Tawsif heard was “lunch,” so he was a little surprised to see us.  Having gotten myself into awkward date situations before because I heard “Do you want to go out for DELICIOUS FOOD (with me)?” when what the unlucky potential suitor was trying to communicate was, “Do you want to go out (to dinner) WITH ME?” I’m not particularly offended.

As mentioned, the impetus was lunch was the trip to Mawa Fish market.  Those intimidating looking scaly creatures have been transformed into traditional dishes, with fresh okra, cucumbers, dal, meat, and rice as well.  I’ve learned to pace myself in these eating events, because new foods often appear once you think you’ve taken full inventory.  Today was no exception.  Green mango with mustard appeared three quarters of the way through the meal; no way was I passing that up!  I tend to get it on the streets, a habit I’m trying to kick based on the looks of terror my Bengali friends give me when I admit it, but it’s hard because it tastes sooooooo good, and it’s so convenient and cheap.  I can be a slow learner sometimes!

Over a truly amazing lunch, we begin to give Ruthie a taste of the social scene in Dhaka as well.  I learn that there is an online dating scene.  The guys get a real kick out of how much I’m paying for rickshaws, and we all have a laugh about some of the recent events that have happened at our soccer games.  For example, earlier in the week, Tawsif had asked me, “Maria, we’re going to take a team picture.  Do you mind being in it?”  Remember now that this is pick up soccer, nothing formal, so a “team” picture strikes me as a little odd.  “Is there a reason I should say no?”  I ask, a little suspicious.  “No, I just don’t like people taking my picture without permission, so I thought I’d ask.”  Ha.  That I’d gotten over a while ago here.  I’m standing around stretching when one of my teammates calls me over to sit next to him.  I smile and decline.  He persists, and eventually I realize that he’s motioning for me to come so that they can take a picture.  Tawsif and Saad are both within 2 feet of me and the picture taking affairs, but they get very, very busy concentrating on lacing up their shoes about this time.  So “team” picture becomes Maria with said teammate, and then a couple other guys rotate in.  I make room for Tawsif to join us on the bench, but he manages to find an excuse not to move. 

Now that all the good food has loosen the boys’ tongues, so I start to find out the backstory on the “team” picture and the various other interesting incidents that have taken place. Evidently it was no coincidence that they were so incredibly busy tying their shoes and didn’t get my back on that one.  No worries; there is always time for round two and payback……..we’ll see who has the last laugh.  Hoping to get my hands on the "team" pictures soon so that I can post them!!

The final piece of wisdom that we impart to Ruthie is the importance of pointing often and aggressively during conversation.  Pointing can be used for many purposes, including:

To interject/interrupt

To emphasize a statement

To chastise

To encourage someone to heed the advice you’re giving them

To express emotion

What's the point?

Tawsif is clearly an expert at pointing and quite generously demonstrates for Ruthie and me many times over the course of the afternoon.  I think we got the basics of the motion—now it’s just getting the timing right.